Outside the Sheriff’s Tower waits a gargantuan chestnut horse pulling a plain wooden carriage. A thin being in a too-big blue shirt, yellow hair like a bowl, speaks in a hushed tone to the mighty animal. He offers kind words, compliments its coat and healthy build. My forced cough sends a jolt through him; he jumps in his spot, startled. He finds my amused grin a moment later, catching a breath of relief.
“Oh, Sir Rokkoh!” he says with an uneven laugh. “It’s you.”
“Expecting someone else?” I ask.
“You never know what to expect after dark,” he replies, running nervous fingers over the hairs on his chin. “Ma always said it’s bad luck to be out at night time. That’s when all the thieves and monsters come out.”
Innocent, naive boy. Still believing in the horror stories his mum told him when he was a wee lad. Recluse, she was. Rarely left her house even during the day. She often sent a servant out to do her errands. If anything, good on Torvald for not succumbing to the same fate. At least he has enough courage to aspire to be a knight, or even a guardsman. But he still has a long journey ahead of him.
“Silly boy,” I say, low, as I approach him and the carriage. “Thievery and monstrosities know not of time. The best pickpockets and burglars strike whenever they please. As for monsters?”
Close now, towering over the boy, I chuckle a dark sound. “They’re always watching, always waiting, always hungry. The worst ones don’t even hide out in the wilds. They live there.”
My thumb points over my shoulder, back to the Sheriff’s Tower. Torvald’s lip quivers, eyebrows disappearing beneath his blond hair. Fear emanates from every pore, and I laugh. Loud, hearty, terrifying. It bounces off the storefronts, the tower itself, and assaults the twiggy boy. I’m surprised he doesn’t piss himself.
“I’m kidding,” I say a moment later, clapping him on the shoulder. “You’ll never be safer than within these walls.”
Torvald chokes out a nervous chuckle and attempts a small smile. He clasps onto his shaky hands, praying they would calm down. Probably also wishes he weren’t so timid, so easily frightened. Time would help with that. Time and experience. The more he would see of the world, the more desensitized he would become. It’s how we all got through our early days of violence and courage. Some of us just got a headstart on the others. Torvald, on the other hand, may be a little behind his peers.
“The Queen mentioned you have our travel plans.”
This seems to ease out his fear. His face lights up with a genuine smile. Excitement, perhaps. He reaches into the pockets of his pants, digging for a moment. It takes a too-long, awkward minute, but finally he reveals a letter much like mine. The seal, green and unbroken, begs for its secrets to be learned. The boy looks at it, hesitating.
“Am I supposed to give this to you?” he asks, childish confusion scrunching his brow into one line. “The courier didn’t specify.”
With a quick hand I snatch the paper from his fingers. He opens his mouth to protest, but swiftly closes it at the sight of my daring look. The instructions, simple and in the same hand as my letter, read:
Follow the main road out of Oakwing
Cross the bridge at the Red Bear River
Stop in Red Bear, ask for Jerl at the Ursa Lodge
Continue in the morning
Cross the border into Walteria
Follow the road to Lower Yellowberry
Find Vicar Senthia
Seems simple enough. An approval huffs out of my nose, sparking a curious and worried look on Tovald’s face.
“What is it?” he asks. I hand the letter back and move past him, stepping into the carriage. “Oh! Seems simple enough. Haven’t had anything bad happen on those roads. Round trip should only be a couple days.”
“Mhm,” I agree, settling onto the plush seat. Stretching out my legs and resting my heels on the seat opposite me, I relax. My eyes close in the comfort, ready to cast me off into wonderful sleep.
“Rokkoh,” comes her voice. With a peek out of the corner of my eyes I find Queen Mathilde standing in the doorway of the carriage, Princess Evalina in her arms to no one’s surprise.
“I’m sleeping,” I mumble, closing my eye and trying to get back to that comfortable place.
“Any good dreams?” she asks, humored.
“Well, there’s one,” I smirk. “Not sure if it’s a dream or a distant memory, but you were there. Maximus too. Remember him? We were all at that tavern deep in the Northern Everglow Wood. Max and I were getting drunk on the special ale there, and you were dancing.”
“Certainly a dream, then,” she giggles. But we both know, whether a dream or a memory, which of the two it is.
“Good dream,” I chuckle, letting my feet down and leaning forward with my elbows on my knees.
The Queen holds the girl close, giving her one last look before offering the sleeping babe to me. With careful hands I accept her. She is so small, so warm, so snug in her white blanket. She sucks on her pacifier as she sleeps, playing in peaceful dreamland.
For a moment, I see it. I see why all the guards fawned over her. I see why Mattie was, and is, so protective of her. I see why she didn’t want to give up the girl so quickly. For a moment, thoughts of disappearing into the night with her play in my mind. It would be easier done than said: have Torvald stop somewhere along the road, break his neck, toss his body into the nearby shrubbery, and leave. We could go anywhere, be anyone. Just a widower and his daughter.
A gentle touch lays the bundled princess on the soft cushion of the seat. She is not mine. It is not my place to keep her from her kin. She has been stolen once already, it would be cruel to steal her again. Skrolba the All-Mother, whose symbol I wear on a chain around my neck underneath the steel armor, would be dissatisfied with such a decision. There would be no coin for securing safe passage to the princess’s homeland.
Speaking of which…
Queen Mathilde holds a small leather pouch as I turn to her. She drops it into my outstretched hand, and I examine the contents.
“Your contact at your destination will provide you with the rest of your payment,” she states. “If you have any trouble with the second installment, seek the King or Queen. They should sort out the matter.”
Her eyes the hue of the jewels in her crown wander to the little child once more, lingering there for a longing moment. She presses her fingers to her lips, gives them a light kiss, and caresses Evalina’s cheek with that kiss. She releases a shaky breath, and even in the low light of the night I can see the glistening in those green eyes.
“You still have time.”
My voice is barely above a whisper. Her eyes shoot to me, fire igniting in that moment. I meet her, and for a long silent moment we hold each other there. She puts everything she has into burning me for saying something so offensive. Unfortunately for her, such heat has little effect on me thanks to too many years of playing with fire like hers. The flames in her die down, diminishing to a smolder as she breaks contact. So much pain, so much desire, so much conflict. She watches the child once more. Like before, something in her changes, brings her back to those sweet imaginations of calling the girl her own.
“If only it were that easy,” she breathes, offering a fake smile. “Not even I could go unpunished for keeping her. You know how Domhnall gets about things when they are no longer of use to him.”
“That’s not what I meant.”
A hand goes to her stomach. She holds it there, wishing so damn hard for the one thing she wants more than anything else in the world to manifest there. Just one, that’s all she asks for. Ideally, if the fates would allow, she would want four in total. Spread out, of course, not all at once. Two of each would be perfect. She even has names picked out for them all, and some to spare. But she only needs one. It would suffice. She would be thankful for that one, and for every day spent together with that one. Every night she prays to whatever god might be listening for just this one thing. Fuck the King, fuck the city, fuck the whole country. She would forsake them all in a heartbeat.
“If only it were that easy.”
The glistening builds, overflows, runs.
She’s gone a second later.
“Are you ready, Sir Rokkoh?” Torvald asks, appearing in the now-empty doorway.
“Get us to Red Bear,” I command. “And keep the ride smooth.”
Torvald nods with an eager smile before shutting the door. A moment later and we’re off. The carriage shakes here and there, but I’m able to relax again regardless. The princess takes no notice of the world around her. Taking her wordless recommendation, I follow her lead and ease into my seat. Eyes closed, with the sound of only the carriage on the road, sleep serenades me with a sweet lullaby. In seconds, I succumb.
Tyler Gohde 
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